A few years ago at an Episcopal church committee meeting, my mother's friend Margie turned to her and said, "I'm waiting for an organization to help the middle aged women in this community who are going silently insane." My mother, always one to create opportunity where there is none, decided to create such an organization. Thus, the MARTHAs were born. The MARTHAs (middle-age, really terrific, healthy, and attractive) began as a small group of women from my mother's church. The name comes from the Biblical story of Mary and Martha, in which Martha did all the kitchen work while Mary sat with Jesus. The MARTHAs decided that it was time to bring Martha out of the kitchen. Once they began to meet, the group grew with such strength and commitment; my mom honestly believed it was the work of the Lord. Within weeks they established a phone tree, since it was becoming difficult to pull off spur of the moment meetings. Now they even have an email tree. The MARTHAs have gone above and beyond what you might consider a "woman's group" to be. They clean each other's houses if a MARTHA has had an illness or a death in the family. They gather money for the Santa Fund. They've had New Year's Eve parties, wedding showers, massive birthday parties where everyone gets a gift (last time my mother got a corset and a flower pin), and graduation parties. They go to ball games. Sometimes they just gather at the Williams Inn or someone's house just to sit and chat. The rules are simple: bring something if you can, and the hostess will welcome people into her home without a lot of fuss and cleaning. My mother has made friendships with women that I don't think she would have ever found without the MARTHAd. They are the strongest support group I've ever seen. My mother lists "co-founder of the MARTHAs" on her resume. At the core of the MARTHAs there's a group of people who know they can call upon each other at any time. No matter what. They're there for each other and welcome almost all women (But my Mom wants me to make it known that Linda Tripp cannot be a MARTHA! They do have SOME standards). The group now goes beyond Ecumenical because it includes women of all faiths. They're all damn good friends and darn good women. There are an infinite number of women's organizations that serve a diverse number of purposes. We should never underestimate the power of a small grassroots group whose sole purpose is to support their peers. The result is amazing - my mother has never been happier in her life. She is an only child, her parents passed away years ago, and we have no family in the area. For the first time in a long time my mother has an extended family, and my brother and I have about 25 surrogate aunts that we can call at any time. Ever since the MARTHAs formed my mother has given me the same birthday toast each year: "Health, happiness and MARTHAs."
—gayle 28Sept99
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